Suspensions throw wrench in WWE plans
It appears the real life story lines are juicer than the made up ones as at least 11 WWE employees are either being suspended or even fired for allegedly receiving steroids and human growth hormones (HGH) from Signature Pharmacy, Internet purchases found during a federal investigation of the company.
One employee, Mike Bucci, stage name Simon Dean, who was a mid-card jobber for a year or so, was terminated after his named surfaced in connection with Signature Pharmacy, his firing coming perhaps due to the fact he was in a management job with WWE. The in-ring talent being suspended will be suspended for 30 days without pay, with one offender reportedly being suspended for 60 days because this was a second offense violation of the wellness policy.
While WWE will likely not announce the names of those being suspended, it’s already apparent who some of them are given the fact Umaga (Eddie Fatu) lost the Intercontinental title Monday night to Jeff Hardy (who himself has previously lost jobs at WWE and TNA allegedly for substance abuse problems) amid reports Umaga was one of those who bought banned substances from Signature. Umaga was also worked over by Triple H using his patented sledgehammer later in the evening, thereby providing a storyline write-off for the Samoan Bulldozer to disappear for a month.
We also saw John Morrison (former Johnny Nitro) lose the ECW title Tuesday night to C.M. Punk after the straight-edge grappler had failed on three prior occasions. We also say RAW general manager Lord William Regal get beat down by John Cena Monday night, thereby writing him off for a month. Both Morrison and Regal were also linked to Signature. I would also look for more superstars to suffer ‘injuries’ or ‘misfortunes’ in the near future to explain their temporary disappearances. Folks like Charlie Haas, also linked to Signature, could disappear for a month and no one would miss him.
It should be pointed out that these suspensions are being leveled not for failing drug tests, but instead, for buying these banned substances online. And, it’s important to note that many of these purchases were not for steroids but were instead for human growth hormones which are near impossible to catch in a test.
It was the same thing which saw New England Patriot safety Rodney Harrison be suspended by the NFL for four games this season as he was linked to the same online pharmacy. In his case, Harrison said he took HGH to help recuperate from injuries he has sustained over years of football, something I think the WWE performers were likely doing given the rigors of professional wrestling.
While suspensions are being handed down, there are some performers who may have sidestepped discipline, such as Randy Orton, also linked to Signature, who is still being written into the main event story line with Cena for Unforgiven later this month. Also, Dave Batista, who was linked to Signature in a Sports Illustrated article, has been added to the Smackdown three-way at Unforgiven with the Great Khali and Rey Mysterio. We also have other major superstars like Booker T, Chavo Guerrero, and Ken Kennedy linked to Signature who could ‘disappear’ in the near future as the fact Kennedy will not be Vince’s son perhaps connected to his affiliation with Signature.
Along with those being suspended for buying banned substances, there are other performers who were let go this week for other reasons. One was Eugene, (Nick Dinsmore) whose character got old a year ago despite the fact Dinsmore is a very accomplished wrestler. Also terminated this week was the very popular tag team Cryme Tyme (JTG and Shad Gaspard). Neither termination was reportedly due to the Signature investigation, but the Cryme Tyme firings are really a head scratcher seeing they were in line for a tag title push.
In the end, the suspensions in relation to Signature are really being brought to appease Congress as Vince McMahon wants to appear he is taking care of business internally so Congress won’t concoct new laws as an election year issue. Perhaps Congress needs to worry about the economy and Iraq instead of professional wrestling.