DiChristina?s stepdaughter haunted by memories of abuse
|
?There are still those nights, maybe once a week or once a month, when you?re lying there in the darkness, when it all comes back to haunt you,? admitted the now 17-year-old stepdaughter of former youth basketball coach Mark DiChristina, serving a year in jail for molesting her five years ago.
DiChristina entered a best-interest plea to the charge of attempted sexual battery last week and was ordered to serve one year of a 10-year sentence and to list himself on the state?s sexual offender registry for life.
Prior to his arrest last year, DiChristina was a respected ball coach for many years. However, his teen-age victim said he kept a dark secret, far away from his public life where he was also awarded Warren County?s cook of the year for his culinary skills.
?He was guilty and he knew if he went to trial he would have faced 24 years, that?s why he entered the plea,? she said.
The teen said it all began with his entering her room and touching her before it became full blown fondling, something she said she kept quiet because she feared she, along with her mom and brother and sister, would be put out on the street.
?I was afraid we?d be left with nothing because my mother was real sick and we were living at Mark?s house. I was afraid if I told on him we?d be homeless,? she said. ?At the time I didn?t realize there were resources out there to help me, help us, and that?s one reason I?m speaking out about this now, because I don?t want other little girls and little boys, to have to go through what I did.?
During her years of silence, she kept a secret journal, drawing pictures, writing poems and notes to herself about the sexual advances she could not reveal to the world. She also turned to self-mutilation, cutting herself on occasions.
?I cut myself to see if I could still feel,? the teen admitted.
The secret was broken about three years later when her younger sister came to her, telling her details of their stepfather?s behavior towards her ? details which sounded all too familiar.
?My little sister came to me crying, telling me about how he was doing things like making her sit in his lap and touching her funny, kind of the same things that happened to me early on,? she said. ?That?s when I went and told someone I trusted, because I couldn?t let the same thing happen to her.?
What followed was an investigation by the Department of Human Services which led to the arrest and eventual jailing of DiChristina.
?Girls need to realize there are resources out there,? she said. ?They need to tell someone, a trusted family member, teacher, church member or someone. It won?t ever get better on its own. You need to turn them in because they have no right to do those things to you.?
She admits she has mixed feelings about the jail time and marked life DiChristina will live once he is out of jail.
?There?s part of me which says he deserves what he got and a lot more. It was a real struggle for a while because I hated that man for what he did to me,? she said. ?But then there?s this little 12-year-old inside of me that keeps saying ?daddy, why did you do that to me.??
While she believes she will feel the aftereffects of the crime for much of her life, she said she is going to turn the negative into a positive.
?Now, because of God, I understand why it happened. I know I?m supposed to help others,? she said, noting she hopes to put together a support group for young victims of sexual abuse. ?I?m going to reach out for people crying for help.?
As for what caused a respected member of the community to cross a forbidden line, both the girl and her mother say there were signs they did not understand.
?We found pornography hidden away in the house and I also found a story about a teacher who had sex with a student which fell out of a bathroom drawer one day,? said DiChristina?s ex-wife and mother of the victim. ?We also had a big fight about the way he was touching his female AAU basketball players at one time. He was getting a little too friendly.?
The mother said it is clear now about her ex-husband?s dark side. However, at the time, she said she was made to feel like she was reading too much into what she saw.
?They (members of her husband?s family) made me think it was all me, telling me I had a sick mind,? she said. ?I guess hindsight is 20/20.?
Given the painful incident in her life, the victim said the end of the long legal battle can bring a small amount of closure.
?It?s going to get better and actually I think it has made me a stronger person,? she said. ?But, it will never really be gone because I?m sure I?m going to be very protective when I have kids. It may be hard to trust people.?