Robservations: This is my year to take Dale down
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Yet hear your friendly neighborhood sports department sits, diligently putting together the stories, photos and opinion pieces that make up the sports page you now hold in your hands.
Don’t get us wrong, we’re more than happy to provide you with your Friday reading material. But all things considered, we’d rather be golfing.
If you’re a regular reader of this piece, as well as Deadly Dale Stubblefield’s Wednesday fare which occupies this same space, you already know that for the past few years, we’ve had a running bragging-rights competition on the golf links.
But in case you’re new to the situation, here’s a recap.
A couple of years ago, while enjoying a week’s vacation from the hustle and bustle of the Standard, Dale decided to include with his Wednesday opinion column a line that I took as a shot at my golfing prowess. To avoid controversy, I went back to the June 19, 2002, edition of the Southern Standard online to find his exact words.
And I quote: “I’m sure Rob has been hitting the course while on vacation and I’m sure he has left his mark on a few courses around the mid-state this week. Who knows, maybe Rob reached his dream of breaking 100 for 18 holes.”
Call me crazy, but I took that as an insult. I’ll have you know, and I let Dale know after reading that slanderous piece, that I broke 100 — yes, for the first time — that very week.
As the battle of boasts continued, several of my friends came to my defense, and called for a match between the paper’s sports writers. Dale had his own supporters, too, with some even suggesting we make things interesting with some sort of wager.
But we’re not the gambling type, so we decided we’d just hit the links and see who really was the better player.
In short, he smoked me. But not so badly I didn’t want to play again. And, since finding playing partners who have Wednesday’s off isn’t that easy a task, we’ve gone on to play several rounds together at courses around the midstate.
And over the years, I’ve honestly say Dale has improved my game — if for no other reason than watching him react after he wins has encouraged me to stop his celebrating.
But while the celebration when he beats you is one thing, watching Dale have an “off” day on the course is something else.
Not to be a tattle-tale, but through all these rounds together, let’s just say one of us tends to keep his cool, while Dale — oops, I mean the other one of us — often tends to lose his composure after making one or two (or seven) bad shots.
We closed out the intrasection golf season last year at Old Stone Fort, and “Mister can’t break 100” slapped a big 88 on the scorecard, breaking 90 for the first time in his life.
You better believe I kept Dale reminded of it over the winter months.
But now, it’s time to start taking advantage of the breaks in our schedules, as well as the return of spring-like temperatures, and renew the human drama of our competition on the golf course.
Plus, in seven days I’ll have to start asking permission to play.
So if I can finish this column, and we can finish this section, we might just take off for 18 in the morning.
Well, what do you know? I’m at the end of my space. Dust off those clubs, Stubby. I’m taking you down this year.