The Scoop: I’d be a brutally honest politician
When it comes to local politics, everyone is curious who has the upper hand in the upcoming elections. It’s with that in mind, the Standard has spent about three weeks distributing surveys to get a sampling of what voters are thinking.
One of the first things folks have been quick to ask is whether our survey is scientific. Considering the poll is named after the person who did most of the work, reporter Duane Sherrill, it’s hard to imagine the survey rating too high on the scientific scale.
But the survey is an accurate account of the 200 people who were polled. How those 200 people makeup Warren County’s total demographic, and how close a reflection they will be to actual voter turnout, has yet to be seen.
It’s easy to hand a registered voter a slip of paper they can fill out in a minute. It’s another thing to expect that registered voter to drive to the polls and actually vote – even if it does only require a five-minute commitment.
After covering the local elections over the last few months, I have made this assessment. I think I would make a pretty good county executive.
I say this not because I have any special prowess when it comes to county government. I say this because I would sure like to make $60,000 a year.
That’s not to suggest I’d have any chance of ever winning a vote – other than to be the first person kicked off the island – but at least I would bring brutal honesty to the campaign. My slogan would be simple: “Dedicated to serving the people of Warren County, and paying off my mortgage early.”
Actually, I wouldn’t have to set my sights so high. I’d settle for register of deeds or trustee and be happy with the $52,000 salary that goes along with each of those jobs.
Let’s face it – when it comes to those jobs, the salary is the drawing point. I don’t imagine many kids have dreams of registering deeds all day when they get to be grown-ups. That’s why my campaign slogan would be straightforward: “Your vote will help me make $52,000.”
All this speculation is not to imply I’m at all dissatisfied with my current job. In fact, I think I’ve got one of the best jobs in McMinnville, and I don’t have to worry about getting voted out of office every four years. I do have to worry about angry readers storming my office, but that’s a different story.
The title of county executive carries with it a certain allure. And I could bring a different approach to the office.
Incumbent Carol Hamblen, a certified public accountant, knows all the ins and outs of keeping the county on firm financial ground. Her two challengers are Bob Warren, who owns a computer store, and Kenneth Rogers, who works at Kroger.
If Warren ran the county like a computer shop, I’d say we’d be in OK shape. That’s provided the county didn’t crash three times a day like my computer here at work.
If Rogers ran the county, we could get coupons to help us pay our property taxes. He could issue buy-one, get-one-free coupons where if you paid your taxes, your mother got hers for free.
If I ran the county, I could run it like a newspaper. There would be no more discussions that lingered for two years. We’d have deadlines three times a week. We would work until the job was finished – no more adjourning for a month and coming back later.
Local government would be so efficient, folks wouldn’t know what to think. And the best part of all is I would make $60,000 a year.
(James Clark is editor of the Standard. He can be reached at 473-2191 or by e-mail at [email protected].)