The Scoop: Ice cream the cure for all that ails you
I was in Warren County Administrative Offices the other day and thought about getting a drink of water.
Fortunately, before I acted foolishly – and at great expense to the taxpayers – I reconsidered.
If I would have gotten that drink of water, it likely would have run up the county’s water bill. That’s not to mention the wear and tear it would have put on the faucet. By the time I finished with that drink, it probably would have dug deep into the pockets of just about everyone in this county. I’m sure everyone is glad I exercised restraint and waited till I got home for that drink. I consider it all just part of doing my part to keep our taxes low.
On the lighter side, there’s only so long I can talk about taxes, taxes and more taxes. There are things other than taxes in this world and some of them are real important – things like ice cream.
But I’ve discovered my love for ice cream, chocolate milk, and all things sweet is not a new trend. Scientist have recently discovered, based on residue found in containers, the Mayans were drinking chocolate as early as 600 B.C.
What amazes me about the discovery is the fact there are scientists out there examining old containers for chocolate residue. You can’t put a kid through college doing that can you?
Here’s the real kicker. Mayans associated chocolate with wealth and power. Many of the elite tombs included chocolate in various forms.
Now that’s a chocolate lover for you. Forget about silk pillows and a satin-laced coffin. The Mayans would have been happy to be buried in a pine box with a Hershey bar.
Today, we still love our chocolate and sweets, just not to that great an extent. The month of July is even designated as National Ice Cream Month. And there are people who even take their ice cream more seriously than I do.
Believe it or not, there are people with doctorate degrees at the University of Missouri-Columbia who are trying to develop a low-fat strawberry ice cream as tasty as the full-fat version. There’s enough interest in this project, the U.S. Department of Agriculture has provided a $108,000 grant to finance two years of study.
And here’s another unbelievable stat. The U.S. Department of Agriculture says the average American consumes 23 quarts of ice cream a year with total sales approaching $20 billion.
The department claims more than 90 percent of households keep ice cream stocked on a regular basis, with the vast majority of those households preferring the rich flavor of full-fat ice cream.
Since I’m just a wealth of information on ice cream today, here are the top five ice cream flavors based on supermarket sales: vanilla (28 percent), chocolate (8 percent), neapolitan (7 percent), butter pecan (4.5 percent) and chocolate chip (3.5 percent).
It just goes to show, ice cream truly is comforting and this revelation is known nationwide. If a child is crying, just produce an ice cream cone and the tears seem to stop. If it’s been a bad day at work, dip into that half gallon in the freezer and suddenly things don’t seem so bad after all.
With all the talk about taxes and the stress surrounding state and local politics, we could all use a break. Tonight I’m going to drown my sorrows in a tub of ice cream.
If I really get wild, I’ll leave the bowl in the cupboard, take the half gallon to the sofa and dig in. I figure as long as I don’t ask to be buried with an ice cream cone, I’m not getting too carried away.
(James Clark is editor of the Standard. He can be reached at 473-2191 or by e-mail at [email protected].)