My acting career on hold for good

After much encouragement, I?m sorry to report that I decided not to audition for the movie ?Tenebrous.? Casting was held yesterday at Capalano?s with hundreds of people lining Main Street for their shot at show business.

However, I was not one of those people. Sure I was there, but I was taking pictures and taking notes ? not reciting lines.

I?m sure the fact I won?t be in the film ?Tenebrous? will come as a letdown to a number of local residents. OK, so it will come as a letdown to my mom and probably no one else.

Unlike so many people who have illusions of seeing themselves on the big screen, I have no desire to act. That?s because I?m fortunate enough to realize I have certain strengths and weaknesses, and public speaking is definitely not a strength. In fact, I would rate it lower than my piano playing (and I struggle with ?Chopsticks?).

I discovered early in life that a career in show business was not in my future. It was in the fifth grade when the teacher, because of my tremendous book smarts, decided I would be the lead character in the end-of-the-year play.

To make a long story short, I was bumped from the lead character to a supporting role. I was then bumped from a supporting role to an even lesser character that basically stood on the side and constantly threw a baseball into a glove.

I occasionally chimed in with such elaborate speaking parts as ?No thanks,? and ?Let?s go.? And I didn?t particularly care for those lines either.

What I found amusing from yesterday?s audition was the fact several people thought I was affiliated with the movie. Because I was rather dressed up in a coat and tie, and was walking around with a camera and notepad, I suppose it was a fairly logical leap to assume I was part of the assessment process.

After all, I was taking pictures and writing notes. It would be reasonable to think I was evaluating the auditions and helping to determine who makes the cut.

With that in mind, just about everybody waiting in line was quick to make small talk with me in hopes of making a favorable impression. I think I got a dozen compliments on a rather tacky tie I was wearing featuring the cartoon characters Yosemite Sam, Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck.

To say good things about that tie really is a stretch. But in the highly competitive movie industry I can see the need to make every moment count and tell some guy you like his ugly tie if you think brownie points are involved.

Thursday?s casting was also a chance to ease some of my concerns about the film and its potential impact on the community. I must admit I was a bit skeptical about how first rate the operation would be, especially since news of the movie being filmed in Warren County was our lead story about two weeks ago.

While I wrote that story, and was the one who decided to place it at the top of the front page, I couldn?t help wondering to myself about the magnitude of the film. Folks are always coming in here talking about grand projects, and quite honestly those projects don?t always materialize the way they are described.

So Thursday was a chance for me to put my fears to rest because I believe ?Tenebrous? will be a large-scale production that?s going to bring hundreds of people to Warren County while it?s being filmed. I think it?s going to inject money, and a great deal of excitement, into this community.

Personally, I can?t wait till the cameras are rolling. And I?m glad I won?t be the one in front of them.

James Clark is editor of the Standard. He can be reached at 473-2191 or by e-mail at [email protected].