What?s the Word: Who is infamous Cooter Brown?

My friends and colleagues here at the Standard sometimes challenge me to come up with the origins of phrases they have heard over the years. Considering there is an embarrassment of riches in the English language as far as old sayings and colloquialisms go, it?s not always so easy to find a logical and believable lineage for some of them. Indeed, some seem to have simply sprung from the actions or legend of some regional personage and from there made their way into the lexicon of English slang.

This week?s challenge comes from Standard sports editor Rob Nunley, who is quite a master of trivia in his own right, particularly in the realm of American popular literature known as the comic book. And, like Standard layout artist Seth Wright, Mr. Nunley isn?t too shabby on TV trivia either. Take my word for it, it?s not a good idea to compete with either of these two, much less both of them, in an ?Andy Griffith Show? trivia contest.

I?ve tried it and it wasn?t pretty.

Anyhow, the two phrases Rob came up with are pretty well-known, but like some that refer to a specific character, aren?t really that easy to pin down to an origin on which everyone is willing to agree.

The first is, ?drunker than Cooter Brown,? or alternatively ?Cooty Brown.?

Most seem to agree the phrase has Southern origins and is used to mean, ?very intoxicated.? One reference says the expression originated in the African-American culture of the Carolinas and probably derived from some proverbial drunkard.

But when I dug a little deeper, I came up with another, and infinitely more, shall we say, troublesome origin for the word ?cooter.? I say troublesome because this one may very well get me in trouble. But it?s also pretty interesting, so I?m going to risk it. However, before I do, I must ask the more proper among my readers to forgive me in advance for delving into some subject matter that borders on the crude. Well, actually it doesn?t so much border on it, it kind of falls smack dab in the middle.

It seems the word ?cooter? has been around in the South for a long time, and may have been brought over by slaves. The West African word for turtle is ?kuta,? which may have eventually evolved into ?cooter.?

At some point Connie C. Eble, a University of North Carolina professor, and an authority on slang, discovered the term?s more seedy derivation, though it comes from a book by our British cousins, ?Cassell?s Dictionary of Slang.? This tome apparently documents the use of the term as a slang substitute for a certain part of the female anatomy. So ?cooter,? along with its slang relative ?cootie,? have taken on a particularly vulgar connotation in some circles.

Now, what this has to do with the ?drunker than Cooter Brown? phrase is beyond me. Of course it might discourage people from naming their child Cooter, like the character played by Ben Jones in the 1980s TV show ?Dukes of Hazzard.? (My apologies in advance to anyone with the first or last name of Cooter.)

The second phrase Rob brought to my attention is ?tighter than Dick?s hatband.? My research shows this one has obscure origins as well, though not quite as crass as the previous one. In fact, the term has been used in a variety of contexts, like ?as fine as Dick?s hatband, ?and ?older than Dick?s hatband.?

But where it comes from, or who Dick was, or even if he was a real person, no one seems to be able to find out. One explanation that intrigues me is that ?Dick? was originally ?Nick,? a reference to the Devil.

Charlie Johnson is news editor of the Standard. He can be reached at 473-2191 or by e-mail at newseditor@southernstandard.com.