Dust off the irons, it?s time for golf

The PGA?s best are in action at Augusta this weekend, and as usual, the arrival of The Masters has this friendly neighborhood hacker?s thoughts turning to spending some quality time on the links.

Normally this time of year, I might issue some kind of challenge to fellow sportswriter Dale Stubblefield, or make some vow regarding how I would show him who?s boss on the golf course this season.

But a rivalry is only truly a rivalry if you don?t know who?s going to win on a given day. And since the winner of our little head-to-head golf encounters is never really a surprise, I?ll just say we?ll enjoy some friendly rounds, and let the results of past competitions stand as proof of who the better man is on the golf course.

(Notice how I didn?t say who usually wins when we play? That?s either a.) because I don?t want to embarrass Dale, or b.) because I don?t want to embarrass myself. You make the call.)

So whether you?re playing for fun, playing for a living, or playing for the occasional side bet of a Coca-Cola or a pack of crackers back at the clubhouse, it?s definitely becoming time to think about getting out on the course.

With all that said, it?s time once again for those of you who can play ? and those of you who just think you can ? to hear this little familiar sermon.

Speed up! Hit the ball! What are you waiting for?

Nothing gets under a golfer?s skin like slow play. Whether you?re going for the top prize at the club championship, or just sneaking away from work on a Friday morning for a quick 18 before you have to get out and cover a game (hint, hint), nobody wants to be held up by the players in front of them.

Personally, the one (and only) thing I?m truly proud of regarding my golf game is the fact that I don?t hold up the people playing behind me. I?ve often said I can shoot my 105 just as quickly as my playing partners can shoot their 75?s, and that holds true to this day (my playing speed, as well ? unfortunately ? as my 105).

If you play around here, let?s face facts. You?re not going for your tour card. You?re just going out for fun. So there?s no need to act like Sergio Garcia in the middle of the fairway, or to spend 20 minutes lining up a putt that you?re not going to come close to making anyway.

So to duffers and scratch players alike, I offer this advice. When you?re out this year, particularly on public courses, play ?ready golf.?

What?s ?ready golf,? you ask? Simply put, when you?re ready to hit the ball, you hit the ball.

Sure, the ?away? rules still apply, especially on the greens. But if you?re 110 yards out, on the far left of the fairway, and your partner is 120 yards out on the right side, don?t wait for him to figure out what club to use and watch his shot fly before lining up. It?s a simple rule of thumb: If you?re not going to hit anybody, then hit the ball.

And another thing. If you wind up in the woods off the tee box, don?t try to muscle your way through a three-foot gap in the trees and onto the green. If you were that good, you wouldn?t be in the woods in the first place. Just chip out, and get on with your round.

Or if nothing else, just stay in the woods, wave me by, and once I play through, you can do what you want.

I?m in a hurry here, people. Dale?s ahead by two strokes, and we?ve got games to cover at 4:30.