Vinson’s Variety: Sexual harassment a double standard
Sexual harassment, we hear and read about it almost every day. Somebody, somewhere alleges that he/she has been the victim of some form of sexual misconduct and files a complaint. I particularly enjoy the high-profile ones you see on shows like “Celebrity Justice,” where it shows a female plaintiff walking into court wearing a mini skirt and a revealing blouse.
Before proceeding further, though, we need to establish an agreed upon definition of sexual harassment. How about this: When one’s personal sense of sexuality has been offended, minus provocation from the plaintiff.
This particular definition might not impress the legal eagles nor be entered into the law books any time soon, but it should suffice for everyday laymen.
Concerning sexual harassment, I have this theory: Men are at serious disadvantage to women, a double-standard, if you please. In short, a woman can file a sexual harassment charge against a man on the most slender of evidence, and a man can’t do the same against a woman – better yet, due to societal expectations, a man is hesitant to do so. Before launching into a defensive tirade, allow me to make a point by using an illustration, as Jesus does in the Bible with parables, no sacrilege meant.
One Saturday night, this single fellow, “Evan,” we’ll call him, early 30s, a writer, goes to a popular nightspot located in a well-known city to do a story on the club. As Evan strolls through the club snapping pictures, he catches the attention of three females, like him, professionals, early 30s, all single, sitting at the bar unaccompanied.
Eventually, one of the ladies snatches Evan’s arm as he passes the three at the bar, inquiring about who he is and exactly what he is doing at the club taking pictures. Informing the three that he is a writer and doing a story on the club, they reciprocate by introducing themselves, what they do for a living, and letting him know, unequivocally, they are unattached and on the prowl.
What the heck, Evan reasons, three attractive, classy ladies has potential! Evan focuses on one in particular, and the other two turn their attention elsewhere. Playfully patting each other on the back and so on, the woman ultimately allows her hand to wander and find a resting place on Evan’s anatomy.
How should Evan react? Enjoy and encourage her to continue, or slap her face, scream for management, have her arrested and press sexual harassment/assault charges? Well, if Evan does the latter, not only will his complaint more than likely fall on deaf ears, he no doubt will be labeled a “social/sexual deviant” by his peers for not obliging the advances of an attractive female.
Now, let’s switch roles: Evan handles the lady in the manner just described – whoops! If she happens to take Evan’s gesture the wrong way, she probably will smack the fire out of him, there, on the spot. He will be thrown out of the club, and, if she possesses the right motivation ($$$), the young lady can successfully pursue sexual harassment/assault charges against Evan, especially if he works for a major magazine or newspaper. How so?
Because, simply enough, that’s the form our society has taken. In the case of Evan and the young lady, he stands to be labeled a misfit either way he goes, and she stands to come out on top either way she goes.
When it comes to the subject of sexual harassment/assault in America, I welcome anyone to convince me there isn’t a serious double standard, with women holding a definitively overbearing edge over men.
(Mike Vinson is a Warren County columnist who can be reached by e-mail at [email protected].)